As I stated in my last entry, I’ve been extremely preoccupied with that which makes me unhappy. I’ve been focused on society’s problems and, on a smaller scale, my personal problems. So to counterbalance this, I’ve decided to make a list of the things in my life that bring me joy. Click through for the list…
Dear friends and family,
Umm… sorry. I’ve been on a bit of a tear lately. It seems that the more I listen to myself talk, the more I sound like a bitter old man… It seems like every day, I engage in some long conversation with one of you about the about the problems of the black community and its self-destructive cycles. It’s gotten to the point where I can’t even listen to music on the radio without pointing out how ignorant it can be. I’ve been harsh and abrasive and generally unpleasant to be around. For this, I am sorry.
I’m sure that you can see that antgoo dot com is up and running again, with semi-regular updates and new articles. But the site has changed quite a bit from last year’s format. Let’s have a look, shall we?
It’s called a Freudian Slip. You’re talking freely. Your mind wanders for a moment and the truth slips out.
Yesterday, I was talking to an old friend, describing my situation and out of my mouth the word “co-dependent” popped. Co-dependent is pretty close to the perfect word to describe my emotional state. Sometimes the truth just pops out of nowhere. Psychologists use this Freudian Slips to gain insight into their patients’ subconscious minds. I think it’s fascinating how a little slip of the tongue, the briefest moment of honesty, can put your whole life into perspective.
Since I’ve moved back to Augusta, I’ve a little depressed. I can see it happening, but I’m not really sure what to do about it. Realizing that I’m a co-dependent person has put things into perspective and shed some light on a recurring problem in my life, loneliness. Loneliness will make you do stupid things. Well, maybe not YOU specifically… but loneliness definitely has made ME do some stupid things.
I wasn’t always proud of my African-American heritage. When I was a kid, I didn’t want to be black. I wasn’t ashamed of my color. I didn’t know about racism. All I knew was that I didn’t want to be “black”. Seeing how I am black, you can see how this was a bit of an issue…
Wait, let’s start at the beginning…
